At Mammoth

April 29, 2006

Snowboarding is fun, it's much easier to learn on the learner's slops. That last trip I had going to Tahoe was just stupid compared to this. I'm starting to learn how to carve; I can actually control myself! The fear is kind of gone as well. I think the main thing was that the advanced slopes never gave me a chance to compensate for the changes in the terrian. Here on the green slopes I was able to play around with my center of gravity and my sense of control.

Very happy that I'm able to spend time with my lil brother. It's been great and he's picking up snowboarding also almost as fast as I am. This means we can learn together and get better together, just another element to bond with. I love my brother =) I hope to be a good brother no matter what.

A little unpleased with the arrangements here, I've been kind of feeling like a 3rd wheel. Perhaps it's just myself though. One thing to note is that I'm still feeling very shameful for what I did to someone so long ago. She's a nice girl, she really doesn't deserve to have a jerk like myself in her past. It's just hard to look at her because I'm afraid of myself, I'm a weakling. It still bothers me from time to time, I think back about it and I say to myself "Why did I ever do such a thing?" I really feel like dirt when i think back to it. What I did was quite shameful and always there's a better way to resolve situations. I still hope to be able to apologee for my actions before I leave this world. It's something I want to do, but I'm stupid and never have enough courage.

Something's missing today. Not sure what that is…


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